Look Who's Talking Now

These days guys rocking baby slings and pushing SUV strollers don't look nearly as pathetic and loser-like to me as they used to, which means two things: I'm actually excited to have children for the first time in my life, and getting engaged automatically made me old. The concept of having kids still gives me more of an “I just got the iPhone” feeling than a deep, meaningful craving to create new life. But it's a start.

My Lady and I had it out about this about three months in: She wanted to have kids, her presence on earth would be a "waste of space" if she never got them, and so if I wasn't prepared to offer up the baby juice down the road than I might as well peace out. Since I dug her--and since I'm too much of a conformist NOT to have children--I agreed and stuck around.

At the time, I looked at babies and wondered if they were basically adults tripping face on a quarter-bag of mushrooms. Hence, the crying, the freaking out, the bug-eyes and the inordinate interest in shiny objects. You see my point.

I still wonder about the babies-tripping theory, but the difference is now, I'd like hang out with that hallucinating, drooling, diapered fool, and perhaps hallucinate, drool and shit myself right alongside him/her. It's weird. I'd even breast-feed, although I'm not sure if that's possible. Is this change of heart because I proposed? And isn't that the dumbest? After getting engaged, I thought I might feel differently about my old lady, but I don't. Instead, I feel a little differently about everything else.