Surprise Wedding Planning Bonus: FREE THERAPY!

This past weekend we went for our first of three (four? five?) appointments with the rabbi who will marry us. And, by God, we're happy.

I had always imagined pre-wedding meetings with religious leaders to involve multiple-choice tests about the various things that can happen during sex that will cause you to go to hell. Maybe that's the second session with the rabbi; I'm not sure. But for the first one, we shot the shit for two full hours -- talking about the history of my family, the relatively awesome story of the big courtship and the Vegas odds on whether our Philadelphia status would prevent us from getting into the New York Times Wedding Section.

The rabbi, who incidentally reads every single edition of the New York Times in chronological order (he's up to the spring of 2002), has the requisite floor to ceiling bookshelves and NO computer. It was the most time I had spent away from technology since I was in Africa, and it was awesome.

Rabbi dropped the f-bomb within the first two minutes of our conversation, and we were off from there. We got a chance to unload a bit about the whole wedding process, and suddenly we were BFFs: Laughing up a storm, sharing stories, getting all sensitive.

Agenda for next session: Formally request that he rocks his bow tie for the ceremony.


billy joel said...

Just make sure he doesn't talk about divorce or make rambling rafting metaphors. That's never a crowd pleaser.

designer-in-denial said...

whoever named them self "billy joel" for commenting on matt's blog is fucking hilarious.

billy goat gruff said...

On the contrary Mr(?) Joel. It pleases me enormously when Rabbis launch into a protracted metaphor, comparing marriage to a game of football ; african safari ; reality cooking show ; peeling an onion or the like. Rafting expeditions are particularly good and I encourage your rabbi to develop his ideas around this theme.

Sugar said...

The guy who married up referred to blogging during the ceremony!

Sugar said...

I mean married "us". Not that I married up. Or did I?

kittynana said...

Happy Hannukah!! Glad to have gotten the invitation e-mail from you regarding your blog! Was lost when our local paper dropped your column.

Lovely Lewiston NY is still waiting for you and your lovely bride to be! Looking forward to the tortuous climb toward the wedding day!

Been there. Done that. Been doing it for 28 years!!! -Amy

ACG said...

a rabbi that drops the f-bomb?! That's fucking awesome! What temple is this? I have been trying to find a new one to join.

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